When I grow up I'm gonna be King of the World.
And I'm gonna live here.
And I'm gonna live here.
I know what you're thinking.
"Beautiful."
Thank you, I've been working out.
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I am "In my country..."
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About Me
The little things...
- Books that have new chapters instead of new paragraphs. Chapter 32, page 73.
- A hot dog is not a sausage.
- Vietnamese dubbing. All actors dubbed with the same bored woman's voice. Conversations between two people read like a shopping list.
- The little barbershops in every country. Someone should do a photo tour of the barbershops of the world.
- I am currently training myself to drink beer.
- Diarmuid may henceforth talk about himself in the third person.
- Every country I visit has the best sunsets and the most beautiful girls I've ever seen.
- Kangaroos can't go backwards.
- Mark Twayne is a genius. As is Donald Clarke.
- Bamboo trees are the best trees in the world ever.
- Ladyboys.
- The irishman I met who claims he carried out surgery on himself using a penknife to remove 4 little wriggling white worms from his own little white worm. Lovely.
- In Nepal its the year 2064. Where we're going we won't need roads.
- Sometimes walking along city streets I suspect someone is following me, a pickpocket maybe. I pause, pretending to window shop and let the suspicious character pass by, then I resume walking. It makes me feel like a spy.
- English Language Newspaper Reports - "Motor-cycle borne miscreants ", "Gave him a sound thrashing", "Caught in the wee hours"
- Car's reverse warning noises (like lorries have). Being serenaded with "Moonlight Sonata" by a reversing Punto.
- Dan Brown novels. The blurb on the back. "One of the samrtest (sic) writers around." Quite. May he burn in a hell of overused exclamation marks, italics and mysterious, beautiful scientists.
- There are 35 ambulances in Delhi for 14 million people.
- Powercuts randomly at anytime, worst at night as it switches off the fans and you wake up and have to peel yourself off the bed, the sheets wet with sweat.
- I have now got a facebook account cos I'm down with the youth of Britain. Bo.
- The Mango Tree Restaurant, where the dining experience is punctuated by the sounds of half eaten mangos thudding into the ground around you, having been thrown from the tree canopy by monkeys high above.
4 comments:
M will want some of those tiles for zucchello.
Thats grand, I took a chisel to some of the better looking tiles, they came straight up. Those ancient Indian builders were cowboys Ted.
make sure it matches the marble toilet seat ...
hotdamn!
i gotta come back
i kinda miss your filth
will be following your footsteps from now on sir
say hi to the chink
:)
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